Interview With A Rat

I interviewed a rat living in a laboratory at Rutgers University. My questions are in black. The rat’s responses are in a ratty shade of red.

So, how is life in the cage?

Not too bad. Shiny new bars, fresh water every day, not to mention my own exercise wheel.

Does it ever get stressful?

Sure. They poke me, they prod me, they stick me in the maze. They constantly want me to do everything ASAP.

So what’s the advantage to you?

I get a certain level of comfort. If I were living in the wild, I’d have to find my own little rat snacks. I’d have to live in a sewer or maybe in a McDonald’s restaurant.

Are you happy?

I’ve got it pretty good. The modern world has been good to me. As long as I stay in the cage, I get a safe, sanitized environment.

So you never think about escape?

Ha, of course I think about it. I think about it all the time.